Bowling for Kardashian

Kim Kardashian says she is in no hurry to get into a relationship. Yeah well, relationships are in no hurry to get into Kim Kardashian either. The Kardashians sisters are planning to write a book. Next, Aishwarya Rai will be planning to act & Tiger Woods will plan on being monogamous.

‘Balls to sport.’ – Pseud Freud

#Mahut-Isner #Wimbledon ~ Hour 6: Spoiled for choice on TV tonight. One channel shows 22 men all chasing the same ball; another shows 2 men killing themselves over a fuzzy little green one. ~ Hour 7: It doesn’t matter who wins now, does it? Everyone is watching to see who dies first ~ Hour 8:…

“I am my own worst enema.” – Pseud Freud

~ In Uganda, calling a woman ‘fat cow’ is considered a compliment. Do not try this at home. ~ Staying hungry is a bad idea. After a point everything looks good. Later still, everything starts looking like food…  Here kitty, kitty. ~ When my eyes get droopy & my mouth drops open in an attractive,…

‘Fuck me. I’m famous.’ – Pseud Freud

~ Lady Gaga’s new video is out. It is yet another traumatic day for television. ~ Britney Spears wants to be frozen in death and brought back to life in the future. If you have children, please, kill them now. ~ It seems everyone is avoiding poor Lindsay Lohan. Even her latest piece of jewellery…

‘Everything is wrong with me.’ – Pseud Freud

~ Then there was that time I misread the signboard and found myself in a Marital Arts class. ~ The Huffington Post claims that women tweet 12% more than men. This now takes a derogatory term like ‘bird’, to mean ‘internet-savvy female’. ~ You call them User Testimonials. I call them old love letters. Potato,…

“You mean ‘Fakebook'” – Pseud Freud

To all the sane, sorted individuals who have no self-esteem issues, please join Facebook and then shut the fuck up. ~ I did the ‘Who Should You Date’ quiz and the bastards on Facebook told me I should ask myself out. ~ Seen on FB: ‘I’m wearing black today for ‘International Day Against Homophobia’. Hasids…

‘I cannot help it. I am caustic at best.’ – Pseud Freud

~ He said: Hey, by any chance did you get a haircut? I replied: Yes. He went on: Yeah! Coz, it looks shorter now! What I said: No shit, you genius. That IS indeed one of the side effects of a haircut. Who are you anyway, Vidal Sassoon? What I should have said: Yes. ~