Why I didn’t text last night

How many times I’ve found myself in bathrooms like this. And how many times I’ve texted a lover using words like, “missing. Empty. Vacant.”

And how many times I said the cramped, crippled sentences: “I love you, I wish you were here.” And how I meant it every time. Every time. And how texting those words felt like a fraud. Because how can someone be so fucking sincere every time? I was.  Maybe sincere is just a kind way of saying I was stupid. Because hungry makes you stupid and I was hungry.

Which kind of person will admit to a poverty of this kind? I have believed once that some love is better than no love at all, right? Right? So wrong. Come on. Put your drunk phone away now, baby.  You’re not changing any lives with “I love yous” tonight.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. The thing about pain, it demands to be felt

    Like

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