Indifferent messages do little to bridge this aching distance or break the silence of days. But I know you are weak and will allow me no more affection than the occasional, careless assembly of words.

I have not slept in what must be two months now. I ache for sleep and for the way it makes one feel – cocooned, lost and found at once. The falling into sleep is like the falling into love – complete surrender. Whatever is going on out there will have to do without me for a few hours. I am disappearing into my fatigue now.

I am terribly lost and so terribly lonely. I miss being held like I miss the rain each parched summer. But who even knows? Not you. Not them. And the rest don’t believe it.

Photo credit: Aidan McManus